Archive for October, 2008|Monthly archive page

Happy Halloween – Costumes for Couples

In Being Gay, Dating, Relationships on October 24, 2008 at 10:20 pm

It’s that time of year where ghouls come out to play and vampires roam the streets! When it comes down to choosing couples Halloween costumes, the variety is less than appealing and kind of lame, let’s be honest. You have the typical Batman and Robin-esque selections and haven’t we seen enough gay guys sport this dynamic duo at every Halloween celebration? I think so. I’m going to offer alternate and original couples costumes for you and your man … happy haunting and be creative!

1) Billy Flynn and a News Reporter Marionette of Chicago

2) Billy Flynn and Amos Hart as Mr. Cellophane of Chicago

3) Ichabod Crane and The Headless Horseman of Sleep Hollow

4) Freddie Cruger and Jason

5) Norman Bates and Mother Bates of Psycho

6) Louis and Lestat of Interview With The Vampire

And for you boys out there that want to be cutsie…

7) An Angel and a Devil

  • By J. Federico

Source 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

I Thee Wed … Gay Romance Is NOT Dead!

In Being Gay, Dating, Relationships on October 23, 2008 at 1:24 am


Meet Bobby and Joseph – two young men who are crazy about each other and ready to take that waltz down the aisle. For most of the young GLBT community, marriage isn’t given a second thought, but for these two crazy kids, it’s a dream come true! May I present to you, Mr. and Mr. … well, read for yourself…


Equal4all: Please give a little background of your relationship with Joseph:


Joseph and I met October 18, 2004 shortly after I had begun my freshman year of college at Virginia Commonwealth University. He was a senior at the University of Richmond -about 5 minutes away in the same city. When we first met, neither of us thought it would turn into anything serious; we both thought the other was not our “type.” I guess we both learned that neither of us really knew what our type was.


After a month of dating for fun, we finally realized that we wanted to be an actual couple and that is when our relationship really began to grow into what it is today.


After 6 months, we moved in together. Some would say it was too soon, but clearly it worked for us. We lived together in Richmond until December 2007. In late December 2007 I graduated from college – we packed up our apartment and moved to NYC together.


We currently share an apartment with our adorable little cat, Archadeus, in midtown west. It has been an absolute blast! We have grown a lot together since moving away from our families and friends.


Equal4all: How did your family react when they found out you were engaged?


When all was said and done, my family was amazing. There were a couple of funny moments when telling them, but that was to be expected I guess. My mom asked me “to who?” I only responded with, “You know who … Joseph, Mom! We have been together for almost four years and just moved to NYC together, who do you think I am engaged to?”


My biological dad didn’t answer his phone when I called him. He returned my call the next day and asked me what my news was. I told him I was engaged and his response was “to who?” I almost died and asked why everyone keeps asking me that. He said “I just want to hear you say it I guess.” Then he said he was so happy for us and I could hear him start to get emotional – in a good way – which isn’t an everyday occurrence for my Texan father.


Everyone has been very happy and very supportive. I am very lucky; especially considering my family is made up of mostly Republicans!


Equal4all: Did the two of you decide to live together before the engagement or is that happening after the walk down the aisle?


We have lived together for about 3 years prior to getting engaged. We moved in together basically 6 months after our relationship started. He was graduating from college, preparing to start graduate school, and needed a roommate; I wanted to move off campus and wanted a roommate. We had been spending almost every night together up until then, so we decided to save ourselves some money and just move in together.


Equal4all: I’ve read that some gay married couples have an open relationship … Once you tie the knot, will Joseph be the only man for you or will it be open? Have the two of you talked about it at all?


Our relationship is not open in that respect. We have no problem talking openly about our feelings or if we find someone attractive because that is human nature, but we do not have sex with other men on the side. It is just not our thing, but I know it works for other couples and that is great for them.


Equal4all: Give us the juicy deets of your wedding: How many in the wedding party? Color you went with for flowers? Matching tuxes? Where is it being held and when? Where are the rings from? Are you going old school; something old/new, borrowed/blue? Writing your own vows?


I think the best way to answer this question is to answer it out of order. The rings, the rings are very special. A close friend of Joseph’s family is a jeweler back in Virginia. He was also Joseph’s confirmation sponsor back when Joseph was a practicing Catholic. He sat us down with a couple gin and tonics and instead of showing us a bunch of the everyday men’s rings you see everywhere he simply took out some paper and asked us about… well … us. He asked how we met, what we were like when we met, what our relationship was like in the beginning. Then he asked us about our current life together, what we like to do for fun together, what we do separately, what our interests are. Then he reviewed his notes and is coming up with personalized rings that will fit us and be one of a kind. They will be white gold or platinum, and just beautiful.


The wedding is going to be a little different. First of all, we are not religious. With that being said we decided we did not want a religious wedding. Personally no real mention of religion will be a part of the wedding. We want the ceremony to be legitimate so we knew we would have to travel to another state. We will be having the ceremony in Massachusetts because that is where Joseph’s family originates. The ceremony will be small and will only consist of a couple close friends and my parents. We plan to have it video taped and shown at our reception which will be held here in NYC. The reception is going to be the big event. We plan on inviting about 130 guests, but we have to cut our list down from where it is right now. As mentioned before we will show a short video of the ceremony at the reception. The reception will be held on the upper east side of Manhattan. It will be a cocktail, music, and hors d’oeurves affair. Everything is still in the works but we think the direction we are going in is best for us.


We started out by trying to plan a big ceremony and full blown reception to take place here in the city, but we realized it wasn’t our style. We aren’t traditional and we are more outgoing. A cocktail event popped into our heads.


Equal4all: Did you propose or did Joseph? What was the planning that went into it? Did it turn out how you imagined?


Joseph proposed to me – he had it all planned out. We were at home and he started acting a little strange. He said to put something nice on, but wouldn’t tell me why or where we were going. While getting ready he played our song, “I’ll Be” and then a bunch of songs from the movie Dirty Dancing. I knew something was up, then it hit me. I thought to myself “he is going to propose to me!” So I texted our friend Jayson and told him I thought tonight was the night. I was bouncing off the walls.


Anyways, as we were leaving he told me I might want to bring my glasses. I thought that was strange but didn’t question him. We left the apartment and started heading from HK toward the eastside. As we crossed town on foot I realized where we were going. There was only one place we would really be going in that part of town and really only one reason I would need my glasses. The Rainbow Room! Sure enough, that is where we went. We took the elevator all the way up and got a bottle of champagne, deserts and enjoyed the view. As we finished our champagne I looked over at him. He seemed nervous but very happy. Then nothing happened. The waiter gave us the bill, he paid and we left. When we hit the street he asked me what was wrong. I guess my face showed everything. I said “is that it?” Like a spoiled 2 year old would do. He said yes and asked what else would there be.


We had a silent walk back to our apartment. When we got there I walked into the dark living room, took my glasses off and sat on the couch. He turned the lights on and sat down next to me. He was just looking straight at me with a smirk on his face, while I sat there not entirely happy. I kept asking him what was so smirky and he would look over at the dinning room table instead of answering me. Since I had my glasses off I couldn’t fully see that far away. Once my eyes focused on the big envelop on the table I realized it kind of looked like my name was written on it. I got off the couch walked over to the table and opened up the envelope that did in fact have my name on it. Inside were the forms for NY domestic partnerships. I looked over at him and he proposed. He was so insanely nervous even though he knew I was going to say yes. We popped open a bottle of champagne and danced to “I’ll Be.”


Immediately after the song I called my mom, then my dad and then texted just about everyone I was close to.


Equal4all: Do you and Joseph have the same political views? If not, how do they differ and how will it affect your vote come November?


We do have the same political views. They aren’t exact, but I don’t think anyone’s are exact. They are 99.9% aligned though. We both supported the same candidate in the primary, and even though our candidate, who we support entirely, did not win the nomination we both are supporting the same person now. We both are extremely passionate about politics and both studied political science in school.


Equal4all: Do you go out a lot or are you the stay in/order out kind of guy?


I would say we are a healthy mix, although my co-workers say I go out a lot more than the rest of them. We love catching happy hour at least once a week. And we try to go out on the weekends. We usually hit the neighborhood bars such as “Barrage.”


We enjoy ordering out, but try to cook as much as we can. It gives us time to do something together and talk without distractions.


Think on your toes questions:


Blue or red?




The ocean or a lake?




Cook or take-out?




Blonds or brunettes?




What kind of car do you drive?


I don’t have a car. Take the subway; used to have a yellow mustang convertible.


Favourite candy bar?


Oh Henry


Favourite website?



  •  Interview conducted by J. Federico



Ben Patrick Johnson Knows How To Work It!

In Being Gay, Dating, Gay Celebrity, Relationships on October 18, 2008 at 2:24 am

Equal4all: How did it feel to be demoted as an on-air correspondent? What were the ramifications of EXTRA’s actions?

BPJ: I will never really know the reasons for certain – there were no legal ramifications, but it certainly didn’t hurt my career! If anything, it launched me and helped legitimize me in the eyes of many. I have not stopped working since Extra, and that was well over a decade ago. Maybe their demoting me was the biggest favor they could have paid me!

Equal4all : Who has been your best and most influential guest on your vlog to date? Why?

BPJ: We’re at well over a million views for the show I did with singer and actor Paul Lekakis. It’s a testament to the viral power of the internet and You Tube.

Equal4all: Were you out and proud during your modeling days? Why/Why Not?

BPJ: Well, I still model. I didn’t really have “modeling days” – I’ve never worked professionally as a model, but I’ve done it for promotional purposes all my adult life.

Equal4all: How do feel about being a gay icon in this day and age?

BPJ: If I am indeed an icon, it’s a lot less treacherous than I imagine it must have been for the pioneers of the gay rights movement a few decades ago.

Equal4all: Do you feel that people take you less seriously since you’ve used your body for a good cause? You asked Reichen on one of your shows, now I want to know how YOU really feel…

BPJ: What I’ve used is my IMAGE. My body is my own.

Equal4all: Please give advice to someone in who is struggling with coming out and being their true selves:

BPJ: You may encounter difficulties as a result of coming out – non-acceptance by some close to you, etc. – but the joys and rewards of being open and honest in your life will far outweigh the difficulties. This is the case for nearly all of us. Furthermore, the more people who come out and live in the fullness of who they really are, the easier it gets for those who will follow. If you don’t do it for yourself, do it for the next generation.

Equal4all: What is your take on GLBT marriage? Do you see yourself marrying the man of your dreams?

BPJ: I enthusiastically support LGBT legal equality including the right to marry. When I find the man of my dreams, I will definitely marry him. 🙂

Equal4all: I want to know (and I’m sure others out there in cyber-land want to know as well…), what’s your ideal first date:

BPJ: Quiet dinner, good conversation on the sofa, some hot make-out and the expectation of more on date #2.

Equal4all: What are your key elements in being in a relationship? Be 100% honest!

BPJ: Do you mean what attracts me? Or what do I look for in a mate? First and foremost (at the beginning) there has to be a chemical/sexual attraction. That’s the glue that will hold things together until a deep love takes over in its place. Then, I need to be made to laugh. He’s got to be smart enough to be clever, and humble. He must have a sense of purpose in his life, and be interested in things that extend beyond himself — a sense of spirituality and a sensitivity to the world in which we live.

Equal4all: Are you really 38?! Get out! What do you do to keep looking as ravishing as you do? Please share any “beauty tips” with us!

BPJ: I am definitely 38. If I look good for my age, it may be because I sleep adequately at night, drink plenty of water and no alcohol, eat a clean diet – sometimes raw vegan, other times just a healthy bodybuilder’s regimen, exercise every day, don’t use party drugs, engage in regular spiritual practice, and get facials once a week. Beyond that, it’s luck and genetics.

  • Interview conducted by J. Federico

Gettin’ To Know Stephen Guarino…

In Being Gay, Dating, Gay Celebrity, Relationships on October 16, 2008 at 11:54 pm


You’ve seen him on The Big Gay Sketch Show, now get to know the man behind the wacky yet loveable characters he portrays!

Equal4all: Where did you get your start with acting? Was it your first career choice?

Stephen: I was a child actor from Orlando, Florida doing commercials and Nickelodeon stuff. I spent one tragic and fateful day on the Mickey Mouse Clubas well. Once, I was suspended from school because I skipped to go on a Sea World commercial audition. In the meeting with the Principal of the school, I screamed, “You dont know what its like to be ME!” I was fierce. The only other career I even barely humoured was being a photographer, but then it put me to sleep.

Equal4all: On The Big Gay Sketch Show, where did you get the ideas to portray memorable characters such as Ronnie and the Russian dancer? Did you impersonate anyone in particular from your personal life?

Stephen: Great question. Both of those characters were inspired by my boyfriend at the time – the NY-based gorgeous gay Ukrainian folk singer Michael Mirlas (yes, that;s all true). I was working a horrific job in the coat check at Spice Market in NY’s Meatpacking District. It was a soul-sucking job that paid out the ass. To keep my heart from petrifying into ice, I would entertain myself by doing a character similar to Ronnie (At the time Ronnie’s name was Dinky, my boyfriend’s pet name for me at the time which has nothing to do with my penis size which I assure you is impressive but more to do with the fact that he and I suffered from a severe case of ‘baby talk.’). As Ronnie, I would pretend that to find the coat I would have to go through the computer system and take forever with the customer. Michael said I should turn that into a character and give him the catchphrase “Is this it?” and always present a coat that couldn’t possibly be the correct one. Then he suggested (after I got the show but before we started) that I do an Svetlana Horkina (gymnast) or Oksana Baueill impression. It didn’t quite work out but morphed into Svetlana. I threw that in to my pitch meeting at the very last minute. Thank God! So basically, I am talent-free and owe Michael some residual payment.

Equal4all: What’re your views on GLBT marriage?

Stephen: You know honestly, I never had a passionate opinion about it sadly because in my insular and man-child existence as an actor whose only responsibility is myself it never effected me. I sometimes considered that I suffer from a cynical view about “true love” (probably to validate my rather extensive sexual practices). But just recently I have been seeing a guy from Amsterdam and we are really hitting it off. The other day he said “Wouldn’t it be nice if we could just marry. Then I could live in America and you could live here and we could actually be together.” And for the first time I thought: Oh fuck! I have limitations! Better get on that! That and the 1100 rights denied us by not marrying. But watching Hillary campaign I think well lets get her in and maybe she’ll get to it in a decade. But for others time is of the essence.

Equal4all: How was it working with “the gay pimp” Johnny McGovern?

Stephen: That dude is a wizard when it comes to getting shit done – Makes me feel lazy. The fact is, he is the nicest guy ever. He makes you feel like you are the only one in the room when he talks to you – A grateful and generous person.

Equal4all: What’s the best city in the world to fulfill your career related endeavors?

Stephen: Well, my dream was to be in theatre and on Broadway, BUT I sent them a letter and they must not have recieved it or they are just not interested lol. I auditioned for it for ten years with close calls and little results. Maybe my personality was just too contemporary. TV has been much easier (which should be laughable to say) but it has. I fit well into TV and now getting into films. So, I spend half the year in Los Angeles. I still prefer NY artistically, but if I was really dreaming I would figure out a way to live in London. I would kill to be in the London theatre scene and doing a show on BBC. So I could stalk and kill Jennifer Saunders my idol.

Equal4all: What’s the 411 on your personal life … single? married? taken? any kids? haha

Stephen: Single by choice for last two years, but I could totally get into one now. I need some lovin’. I am a notorious chubby chaser. The word “stocky” is good for me. Tall, tan, blonde, and just out of a pool … not good for me. I also will be spending alot of time on my boyfriend south of the ankles if you know what I mean.

Equal4all: Please give advice to anyone struggling with their sexuality in the GLBT community:

Stephen: I suppose it would be the obvious three: 1. That poppers are still Amyll Nitrate and still you will probably suffer from a mild headache. 2. That being gay is just better. Better hours and better pay.3. You can still achieve everything you want regardless of it. Or in my case because of it.

Equal4all: So far, what’s been your most memorable and personal gig as an actor?

Stephen: I still do a show in NYC called The Nuclear Family. Its a 3-man improvised musical that we have done around the country and was Off Broadway run in 2003. Its my best and funniest work and was created with my long-term comedy partners Jimmy Bennett and John Gregorio. If your in NY you must see it! (thenuclearfamily.net)

Equal4all: Are you a party boy or a stay in/order out kinda guy?

Stephen: I think I am cyclical. I go through bouts where I am out every night drinking and having sex or trying to find the sleaziest place in town. But during audition times I will be at home more literally getting the maximum out of my Netflix membership. I am raping that company and all it gets is $17.99!

Equal4all: What’re some upcoming roles/gigs of yours that we need to keep our eyes peeled for?

Well, cross your fingers that I could be in this new PJ Hogan movie (Muriel’s Wedding) called Confessions of a Shopaholic. You just missed me on the cancelled Wedding Bells on FOX. On the second season of BGSS you are getting alot more Ron Odyssey (Ronnie) and Svetlana, plus a new character Chaps McFadden who is an extremely disgruntled fairy-tale-reading fairy. Look out for some killer celebrities on the show too! Thanks for watching the show! Support gay programming!

  • Interview conducted by J. Federico

Sleek but Dirty – real dirty … Valeze spills their guts with a vengeance!

In Uncategorized on October 16, 2008 at 11:38 pm

They’re every punk rocker’s wet dream — with an up-to-date retro sound and kick ass attitude, this band shows no mercy and def no signs of slowing down!

The band includes:

Tiff- vocals

Alan- guitar

Tim- keys

Joe- bass

Miles- drums

How do you feel about having a pretty decently sized gay following?

Tiff: We LOVE our audience. It’s a family and a community that seems to grow at each show. We never know what to expect at a show – but the one thing that is consistent is that it’s diverse, unpretentious, and there’s a real sense of community and love … We want everyone to just be who they are and enjoy everyone else in the room for their individuality, instead of judging them for being different. Frankly, we don’t care if you’re in a suit or in sparkly pink undies, as long as you’re bringing it. (Although lets be honest – the more naked the better 😉 )

When asked who the band’s 80s influences are, they reply with, “Baby, the list goes on…” Who are your top influences?

Tiff says: My main influences are Elvis, Billy Idol, Axl Rose, Bjork, Pet Shop Boys, and Billie Holliday.

Miles: Motown, 70’s funk, and 80’s punk.

Tiff: The band has a ton of influences though – we all listen to a lot of different music – but some of our biggest as a group are The Clash, The Sex Pistols, Blondie, Missing Persons, The Cars, Pretenders, Talking Heads.

What would you guys like to say to those out there who dare to be different and deny today’s stereotypes and expectations?

Tim: We think that they are the demise of modern civilization as we know it – and we applaud their efforts.

 Miles: The only people who are truly innovative are ones who are willing to break the rules and deny stereotypes!

Tiff: Stereotypes and expectations are all bullshit illusions created to make us all feel “safe”. Dare – be different – be selfish – be how you feel, not how someone says you should feel. Just be honest with yourself at all times b/c right now is the only thing that’s real.

Are all of you the original members?

Tim: No. But we won’t tell you who- you have to guess. And every time you guess wrong, we get to whack you in the ass with a studded paddle.

I know you perform in the city quite often … What would you like to say about NYC? – Is it truly the city where anything can happen? – What’s your craziest city experience?

Alan: One of them was our studio-trashing party, when we moved out of our old rehearsal place. We invited people off the street, got extremely wasted, played a show, and then demolished the place.

Miles: I saw a guy hit a bike messenger with his Escalade on Wall Street, then get out of the car to talk to the guy he hit and make sure he was okay. After a few minutes of talking, the guy punches the messenger in the face for asking him for his information!

Tiff: Oh God … things I can’t repeat — some interesting things always happen in the make out room at CIRCUS though … that is always a spectacle!

Tim: Being arrested for “falling asleep” on the train… (something suspicious about that one…)

In your own words, what kind of style do you have as a band? (both musically and wardrobe wise)

Tim: Sleek but dirty – real dirty.

Can you give us a round-about schedule of upcoming events?

Tiff: We’re releasing our EP “Go Go Go!” in Dec/Jan and working on a video right now—Should be hot! We’ve got shows happening all fall really…Best thing is to get on our mailing list or keep checking valeze.net and myspace for show updates. (www.myspace.com/valeze)

Tiffany, your voice is very reminiscent of Gwen Stefani, is that the sound you were looking for?

Tiff: No – I try not to think about the sound and just focus on the emotion. I get the comparison sometimes, but it doesn’t really bother me anymore b/c my voice has its own agenda and I can’t really fight it 😉

What do you think of Gwen Stefani as a role model and gay icon?

Tiff: She’s a sexy bitch – why not? 😉

How do you see yourselves being role models for today’s youth?

Tim: We don’t really. For the youth’s sake, let’s hope they have the same opinion.

  • Interview conducted by J. Federico

So, you’re moving in together … Mazel Tov!

In Being Gay, Dating, Gay Celebrity, Relationships on October 16, 2008 at 11:29 pm

So, you’re moving in together – Mazel Tov! … And you need advice? Well, you’ve come to the right place!

I have lived with three boyfriends before; the first was “our” apartment that we both moved into together. The second was “my” apartment that he moved into and the third was “his” apartment that I moved in to. Out of all these possible scenarios, moving into a place together is the best way to go. Look at this as much as a marriage as you can. Before the new place, you could leave your boyfriend at anytime and anywhere. Now you have a leash; a force that binds you to not only another human being, but a place of co-habitation. This force is known as “the lease.”

The lease is the real commitment; prior to the lease, if you and your boy were at a party, someone would inevitably ask you if you think each other are the one. “Sure,” you say -“why not?” You have nothing to lose. If he’s not the one then “he’s” not the one and you go home. But with the lease you’re really saying “I give it a year solid, after which our commitment is based on a month to month.” I’m all about love and being spontaneous but all I’m saying is protect yourself and know your rights. Have the uncomfortable conversation with him about what should happen if you two do break up. What happens to the house? Who moves out? Who keeps the dog? I’m assuming you’ll get a dog because let’s face it, that’s what gays do.

I’ve been dating guys for over 10 years now – A couple models, a couple older business types, a celebrity, and some “regular Joes.” And after all my mistakes, the bottom line is honesty and openness. Talking about how things might end is not unromantic or tainting the idea of moving in, it’s the responsible thing to do for both of you. If you truly care about each other and want to protect each other then make sure you’re clear on all aspects. All that being said, only invite your rich gay friends to your house warming – the others will bring cheap wine that they’ll end up drinking themselves and spilling onto your carpet.


Photo source